Inclusion

Picture this: Two or more people are having a conversation. We walk up to join the group. We are unfamiliar with the group, topic, or language and no one in the group takes the time to include us or make us feel comfortable. How would we feel? Many of us have been in this position so we can relate to this feeling. Were you ever in this position?

I consider the issue of inclusion a problem that needs to be addressed and resolved. I would like to propose a different view of the word inclusion as it relates to communication. Including others in our groups or conversations is an aspect of communication that we neglect to focus on. By being inclusive, not only will we make someone more comfortable but we ourselves will attain the benefits of conversing with new people and expanding our network. However, not only must we learn to include others in our lives, groups and conversations; we must also learn how to assimilate ourselves into other people’s groups, conversations and lives.

I would like to recommend three simple steps to take when faced with a situation where someone new approaches our group or conversation.

1. Welcome him/her into the group and the conversation

2. Make him/her feel comfortable and included

3. Be aware of different personalities

Step 1: Welcome the new person into the group. How do we welcome someone into our group? A simple handshake and introduction of the group members and ourselves will work. If the new person is unknown by everyone in the group give some information about each person relevant to the situation or gathering. This will make the new person more familiar with the group and he/she will be able to converse more easily with the members.

Step 2: After we have welcomed the new person we now have to make him/her feel comfortable. We may use body language to include him/her, for example, nodding, smiling, and eye contact. Sometimes we may have to draw him/her into the conversation or we may even need to change the topic if the new person is not familiar with it. An example where we may need to change topics is if two people are in the same field of work and another person from another profession joins them, he/she may not fit into the group’s original conversation about work.

Step 3: It is important to be aware of different personalities. Some people are shy, quiet or introverted and not outgoing and extroverted. Some are listeners and not talkers. Shy people may need a bit more assistance to achieve a suitable comfort level. Listeners may not express or share their feelings readily. As good communicators we can draw opinions out by asking direct questions. Different personalities make for an interesting conversation.